Elm

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I know the bottom, she says.  I know it with my great tap root;
 It is what you fear.
 I do not fear it: I have been there.

 Is it the sea you hear in me,
 Its dissatisfactions?
 Or the voice of nothing, that was you madness?

 Love is a shadow.
 How you lie and cry after it.
 Listen: these are its hooves: it has gone off, like a horse.

 All night I shall gallup thus, impetuously,
 Till your head is a stone, your pillow a little turf,
 Echoing, echoing.

 Or shall I bring you the sound of poisons?
 This is rain now, the big hush.
 And this is the fruit of it: tin white, like arsenic.

 I have suffered the atrocity of sunsets.
 Scorched to the root
 My red filaments burn and stand,a hand of wires.

 Now I break up in pieces that fly about like clubs.
 A wind of such violence
 Will tolerate no bystanding: I must shriek.

 The moon, also, is merciless: she would drag me
 Cruelly, being barren.
 Her radiance scathes me.  Or perhaps I have caught her.

 I let her go.  I let her go
 Diminished and flat, as after radical surgery.
 How your bad dreams possess and endow me.

 I am inhabited by a cry.
 Nightly it flaps out
 Looking, with its hooks, for something to love.

 I am terrified by this dark thing
 That sleeps in me;
 All day I feel its soft, feathery turnings, its malignity.

 Clouds pass and disperse.
 Are those the faces of love, those pale irretrievables?
 Is it for such I agitate my heart?

 I am incapable of more knowledge.
 What is this, this face
 So murderous in its strangle of branches?-

 Its snaky acids kiss.
 It petrifies the will.  These are the isolate, slow faults
 That kill, that kill, that kill.

© Sylvia Plath