Ive never ceased to curse the day I signed
A seven years bargain for the Golden Fleece.
Twas a bad deal all round; and dear enough
It cost me, what with my daft management,
And the mean folk as owed and never paid me,
And backing losers; and the local bucks
Egging me on with whiskys while I bragged
The man I was when huntsman to the Squire.
Id have been prosperous if Id took a farm
Of fifty acres, drove my gig and haggled
At Monday markets; now Ive squandered all
My savings; nigh three hundred pound I got
As testimonial when Id grown too stiff
And slow to press a beaten fox.
The Fleece!
Twas the damned Fleece that wore my Emily out,
The wife of thirty years who served me well;
(Not like this beldam clattering in the kitchen,
That never trims a lamp nor sweeps the floor,
And brings me greasy soup in a foul crock.)
Blast the old harridan! Whats fetched her now,
Leaving me in the dark, and short of fire?
And wheres my pipe? Tis lucky Ive a turn
For thinking, and remembering all thats past.
And nows my hour, before I hobble to bed,
To set the works a-wheezing, wind the clock
That keeps the time of life with feeble tick
Behind my bleared old face that stares and wonders.
. . . .
Its queer how, in the dark, comes back to mind
Some morning of September. Weve been digging
In a steep sandy warren, riddled with holes,
And Ive just pulled the terrier out and left
A sharp-nosed cub-face blinking there and snapping,
Then in a moment seen him mobbed and torn
To strips in the baying hurly of the pack.
I picture it so clear: the dusty sunshine
On bracken, and the men with spades, that wipe
Red faces: one tilts up a mug of ale.
And, having stopped to clean my gory hands,
I whistle the jostling beauties out of the wood.
Im but a daft old fool! I often wish
The Squire were back againah! he was a man!
They dont breed men like him these days; hed come
For sure, and sit and talk and suck his briar
Till the old wife brings up a dish of tea.
Ay, those were days, when I was serving Squire!
I never knowed such sport as 85,
The winter afore the one that snowed us silly.
. . . .
Once in a way the parson will drop in
And read a bit o the Bible, if Im bad,
And pray the Lord to make my spirit whole
In faith: he leaves some baccy on the shelf,
And wonders I dont keep a dog to cheer me
Because he knows Im mortal fond of dogs!
I ask you, whats a gent like that to me
As wouldnt know Elijah if I saw him,
Nor have the wit to keep him on the talk?
Tis kind of parson to be troubling still
With such as me; but hes a town-bred chap,
Full of his college notions and Christmas hymns.
Religion beats me. Im amazed at folk
Drinking the gospels in and never scratching
Their heads for questions. When I was a lad
I learned a bit from mother, and never thought
To educate myself for prayers and psalms.
But now Im old and bald and serious-minded,
With days to sit and ponder. Id no chance
When young and gay to get the hang of all
This Hell and Heaven: and when the clergy hoick
And holloa from their pulpits, Im asleep,
However hard I listen; and when they pray
It seems were all like children sucking sweets
In school, and wondering whether master sees.
I used to dream of Hell when I was first
Promoted to a huntsmans job, and scent
Was rotten, and all the foxes disappeared,
And hounds were short of blood; and officers
From barracks over-rode em all day long
On weedy, whistling nags that knocked a hole
In every fence; good sportsmen to a man
And brigadiers by now, but dreadful hard
On a young huntsman keen to show some sport.
Ay, Hell was thick with captains, and I rode
The lumbering brute thats beat in half a mile,
And blunders into every blind old ditch.
Hell was the coldest scenting land Ive known,
And both my whips were always lost, and hounds
Would never get their heads down; and a man
On a great yawing chestnut trying to cast em
While I was in a corner pounded by
The ugliest hog-backed stile youve clapped your eyes on.
There was an iron-spiked fence round all the coverts,
And civil-spoken keepers I couldnt trust,
And the main earth unstoppd. The fox I found
Was always a three-legged un from a bag,
Who reeked of aniseed and wouldnt run.
The farmers were all ploughing their old pasture
And bellowing at me when I rode their beans
To cast for beaten fox, or galloped on
With hounds to a lucky view. Id lost my voice
Although I shouted fit to burst my guts,
And couldnt blow my horn.
And when I woke,
Emily snored, and barn-cocks started crowing,
And morn was at the window; and I was glad
To be alive because I heard the cry
Of hounds like church-bells chiming on a Sunday.
Ay, thats the song Id wish to hear in Heaven!
The cry of hounds was Heaven for me: I know
Parson would call me crazed and wrong to say it,
But wheres the use of life and being glad
If Gods not in your gladness?
Ive no brains
For book-learned studies; but Ive heard men say
Theres much in print that clergy have to wink at:
Though many Ive met were jolly chaps, and rode
To hounds, and walked me puppies; and could pick
Good legs and loins and necks and shoulders, ay,
And feettwas necks and feet I looked at first.
Some hounds Ive known were wise as half your saints,
And better hunters. That old dog of the Dukes,
Harlequin; what a dog he was to draw!
And what a note he had, and what a nose
When foxes ran down wind and scent was catchy!
And that light lemon bitch of the Squires, old Dorcas
She were a marvellous hunter, were old Dorcas!
Ay, oft Ive thought, If there were hounds in Heaven,
With God as master, taking no subscription;
And all His bless?d country farmed by tenants,
And a straight-necked old fox in every gorse!
But when I came to work it out, I found
Thered be too many huntsmen wanting places,
Though some Ive known might get a job with Nick!
. . . .
Ive come to think of God as something like
The figure of a man the old Duke was
When I was turning hounds to Nimrod King,
Before his Grace was took so bad with gout
And had to quit the saddle. Tall and spare,
Clean-shaved and grey, with shrewd, kind eyes, that twinkled,
And easy walk; who, when he gave good words,
Gave them whole-hearted; and would never blame
Without just cause. Lord God might be like that,
Sitting alone in a great room of books
Some evening after hunting.
Now Im tired
With hearkening to the tick-tack on the shelf;
And pondering makes me doubtful.
Riding home
On a moonless night of cloud that feels like frost
Though stars are hidden (hold your feet up, horse!)
And thinking what a task I had to draw
A pack with all those lame uns, and the lot
Wanting a rest from all this open weather;
Thats what Im doing now.
And likely, too,
The frostll be a long un, and the night
One sleep. The parsons say well wake to find
A country blinding-white with dazzle of snow.
The naked stars make men feel lonely, wheeling
And glinting on the puddles in the road.
And then you listen to the wind, and wonder
If folk are quite such bucks as they appear
When dressed by London tailors, looking down
Their boots at covert side, and thinking big.
. . . .
This worlds a funny place to live in. Soon
Ill need to change my country; but I know
Tis little enough Ive understood my life,
And a power of sights Ive missed, and foreign marvels.
I used to feel it, riding on spring days
In meadows pied with sun and chasing clouds,
And half forget how I was there to catch
The foxes; lose the angry, eager feeling
A huntsman ought to have, thats out for blood,
And means his hounds to get it!
Now I know
Its God that speaks to us when were bewitched,
Smelling the hay in June and smiling quiet;
Or when theres been a spell of summer drought,
Lying awake and listening to the rain.
. . . .
Id like to be the simpleton I was
In the old days when I was whipping-in
To a little harrier-pack in Worcestershire,
And loved a dairymaid, but never knew it
Until shed wed another. So Ive loved
My life; and when the good years are gone down,
Discover what Ive lost.
I never broke
Out of my blundering self into the world,
But let it all go past me, like a man
Half asleep in a land thats full of wars.
What a grand thing twould be if I could go
Back to the kennels now and take my hounds
For summer exercise; be riding out
With forty couple when the quiet skies
Are streaked with sunrise, and the silly birds
Grown hoarse with singing; cobwebs on the furze
Up on the hill, and all the country strange,
With no one stirring; and the horses fresh,
Sniffing the air Ill never breathe again.
. . . .
Youve brought the lamp, then, Martha? Ive no mind
For newspaper to-night, nor bread and cheese.
Give me the candle, and Ill get to bed.