The three stood listening to a fresh access
Of wind that caught against the house a moment,
Gulped snow, and then blew free againthe Coles
Dressed, but dishevelled from some hours of sleep,
Meserve belittled in the great skin coat he wore.
Meserve was first to speak. He pointed backward
Over his shoulder with his pipe-stem, saying,
You can just see it glancing off the roof
Making a great scroll upward toward the sky,
Long enough for recording all our names on.
I think Ill just call up my wife and tell her
Im hereso farand starting on again.
Ill call her softly so that if shes wise
And gone to sleep, she neednt wake to answer.
Three times he barely stirred the bell, then listened.
Why, Lett, still up? Lett, Im at Coles. Im late.
I called you up to say Good-night from here
Before I went to say Good-morning there.
I thought I would. I know, but, LettI know
I could, but whats the sense? The rest wont be
So bad. Give me an hour for it. Ho, ho,
Three hours to here! But that was all up hill;
The rest is down. Why no, no, not a wallow:
They kept their heads and took their time to it
Like darlings, both of them. Theyre in the barn.
My dear, Im coming just the same. I didnt
Call you to ask you to invite me home.
He lingered for some word she wouldnt say,
Said it at last himself, Good-night, and then,
Getting no answer, closed the telephone.
The three stood in the lamplight round the table
With lowered eyes a moment till he said,
Ill just see how the horses are.
Yes, do,
Both the Coles said together. Mrs. Cole
Added: You can judge better after seeing.
I want you here with me, Fred. Leave him here,
Brother Meserve. You know to find your way
Out through the shed.
I guess I know my way,
I guess I know where I can find my name
Carved in the shed to tell me who I am
If it dont tell me where I am. I used
To play
You tend your horses and come back.
Fred Cole, youre going to let him!
Well, arent you?
How can you help yourself?
I called him Brother.
Why did I call him that?
Its right enough.
Thats all you ever heard him called round here.
He seems to have lost off his Christian name.
Christian enough I should call that myself.
He took no notice, did he? Well, at least
I didnt use it out of love of him,
The dear knows. I detest the thought of him
With his ten children under ten years old.
I hate his wretched little Racker Sect,
Alls ever I heard of it, which isnt much.
But thats not sayingLook, Fred Cole, its twelve,
Isnt it, now? Hes been here half an hour.
He says he left the village store at nine.
Three hours to do four milesa mile an hour
Or not much better. Why, it doesnt seem
As if a man could move that slow and move.
Try to think what he did with all that time.
And three miles more to go!
Dont let him go.
Stick to him, Helen. Make him answer you.
That sort of man talks straight on all his life
From the last thing he said himself, stone deaf
To anything anyone else may say.
I should have thought, though, you could make him hear you.
What is he doing out a night like this?
Why cant he stay at home?
He had to preach.
Its no night to be out.
He may be small,
He may be good, but one things sure, hes tough.
And strong of stale tobacco.
Hell pull through.
You only say so. Not another house
Or shelter to put into from this place
To theirs. Im going to call his wife again.
Wait and he may. Lets see what he will do.
Lets see if he will think of her again.
But then I doubt hes thinking of himself
He doesnt look on it as anything.
He shant gothere!
It is a night, my dear.
One thing: he didnt drag God into it.
He dont consider it a case for God.
You think so, do you? You dont know the kind.
Hes getting up a miracle this minute.
Privatelyto himself, right now, hes thinking
Hell make a case of it if he succeeds,
But keep still if he fails.
Keep still all over.
Hell be deaddead and buried.
Such a trouble!
Not but Ive every reason not to care
What happens to him if it only takes
Some of the sanctimonious conceit
Out of one of those pious scalawags.
Nonsense to that! You want to see him safe.
You like the runt.
Dont you a little?
Well,
I dont like what hes doing, which is what
You like, and like him for.
Oh, yes you do.
You like your fun as well as anyone;
Only you women have to put these airs on
To impress men. Youve got us so ashamed
Of being men we cant look at a good fight
Between two boys and not feel bound to stop it.
Let the man freeze an ear or two, I say.
Hes here. I leave him all to you. Go in
And save his life. All right, come in, Meserve.
Sit down, sit down. How did you find the horses?
Fine, fine.
And ready for some more? My wife here
Says it wont do. Youve got to give it up.
Wont you to please me? Please! If I say please?
Mr. Meserve, Ill leave it to your wife.
What did your wife say on the telephone?
Meserve seemed to heed nothing but the lamp
Or something not far from it on the table.
By straightening out and lifting a forefinger,
He pointed with his hand from where it lay
Like a white crumpled spider on his knee:
That leaf there in your open book! It moved
Just then, I thought. Its stood erect like that,
There on the table, ever since I came,
Trying to turn itself backward or forward,
Ive had my eye on it to make out which;
If forward, then its with a friends impatience
You see I knowto get you on to things
It wants to see how you will take, if backward
Its from regret for something you have passed
And failed to see the good of. Never mind,
Things must expect to come in front of us
A many timesI dont say just how many
That varies with the thingsbefore we see them.
One of the lies would make it out that nothing
Ever presents itself before us twice.
Where would we be at last if that were so?
Our very life depends on everythings
Recurring till we answer from within.
The thousandth time may prove the charm. That leaf!
It cant turn either way. It needs the winds help.
But the wind didnt move it if it moved.
It moved itself. The winds at naught in here.
It couldnt stir so sensitively poised
A thing as that. It couldnt reach the lamp
To get a puff of black smoke from the flame,
Or blow a rumple in the collies coat.
You make a little foursquare block of air,
Quiet and light and warm, in spite of all
The illimitable dark and cold and storm,
And by so doing give these three, lamp, dog,
And book-leaf, that keep near you, their repose;
Though for all anyone can tell, repose
May be the thing you havent, yet you give it.
So false it is that what we havent we cant give;
So false, that what we always say is true.
Ill have to turn the leaf if no one else will.
It wont lie down. Then let it stand. Who cares?
I shouldnt want to hurry you, Meserve,
But if youre going Say youll stay, you know?
But let me raise this curtain on a scene,
And show you how its piling up against you.
You see the snow-white through the white of frost?
Ask Helen how far up the sash its climbed
Since last we read the gage.
It looks as if
Some pallid thing had squashed its features flat
And its eyes shut with overeagerness
To see what people found so interesting
In one another, and had gone to sleep
Of its own stupid lack of understanding,
Or broken its white neck of mushroom stuff
Short off, and died against the window-pane.
Brother Meserve, take care, youll scare yourself
More than you will us with such nightmare talk.
Its you it matters to, because its you
Who have to go out into it alone.
Let him talk, Helen, and perhaps hell stay.
Before you drop the curtainIm reminded:
You recollect the boy who came out here
To breathe the air one winterhad a room
Down at the Averys? Well, one sunny morning
After a downy storm, he passed our place
And found me banking up the house with snow.
And I was burrowing in deep for warmth,
Piling it well above the window-sills.
The snow against the window caught his eye.
Hey, thats a pretty thoughtthose were his words.
So you can think its six feet deep outside,
While you sit warm and read up balanced rations.
You cant get too much winter in the winter.
Those were his words. And he went home and all
But banked the daylight out of Averys windows.
Now you and I would go to no such length.
At the same time you cant deny it makes
It not a mite worse, sitting here, we three,
Playing our fancy, to have the snowline run
So high across the pane outside. There where
There is a sort of tunnel in the frost
More like a tunnel than a holeway down
At the far end of it you see a stir
And quiver like the frayed edge of the drift
Blown in the wind. I like thatI like that.
Well, now I leave you, people.
Come, Meserve,
We thought you were deciding not to go
The ways you found to say the praise of comfort
And being where you are. You want to stay.
Ill own its cold for such a fall of snow.
This house is frozen brittle, all except
This room you sit in. If you think the wind
Sounds further off, its not because its dying;
Youre further under in the snowthats all
And feel it less. Hear the soft bombs of dust
It bursts against us at the chimney mouth,
And at the eaves. I like it from inside
More than I shall out in it. But the horses
Are rested and its time to say good-night,
And let you get to bed again. Good-night,
Sorry I had to break in on your sleep.
Lucky for you you did. Lucky for you
You had us for a half-way station
To stop at. If you were the kind of man
Paid heed to women, youd take my advice
And for your familys sake stay where you are.
But what good is my saying it over and over?
Youve done more than you had a right to think
You could donow. You know the risk you take
In going on.
Our snow-storms as a rule
Arent looked on as man-killers, and although
Id rather be the beast that sleeps the sleep
Under it all, his door sealed up and lost,
Than the man fighting it to keep above it,
Yet think of the small birds at roost and not
In nests. Shall I be counted less than they are?
Their bulk in water would be frozen rock
In no time out to-night. And yet to-morrow
They will come budding boughs from tree to tree
Flirting their wings and saying Chickadee,
As if not knowing what you meant by the word storm.
But why when no one wants you to go on?
Your wifeshe doesnt want you to. We dont,
And you yourself dont want to. Who else is there?
Save us from being cornered by a woman.
Well, theresShe told Fred afterward that in
The pause right there, she thought the dreaded word
Was coming, God. But no, he only said
Well, theresthe storm. That says I must go on.
That wants me as a war might if it came.
Ask any man.
He threw her that as something
To last her till he got outside the door.
He had Cole with him to the barn to see him off.
When Cole returned he found his wife still standing
Beside the table near the open book,
Not reading it.
Well, what kind of a man
Do you call that? she said.
He had the gift
Of words, or is it tongues, I ought to say?
Was ever such a man for seeing likeness?
Or disregarding peoples civil questions
What? Weve found out in one hour more about him
Than we had seeing him pass by in the road
A thousand times. If thats the way he preaches!
You didnt think youd keep him after all.
Oh, Im not blaming you. He didnt leave you
Much say in the matter, and Im just as glad
Were not in for a night of him. No sleep
If he had stayed. The least thing set him going.
Its quiet as an empty church without him.
But how much better off are we as it is?
Well have to sit here till we know hes safe.
Yes, I suppose youll want to, but I shouldnt.
He knows what he can do, or he wouldnt try.
Get into bed I say, and get some rest.
He wont come back, and if he telephones,
It wont be for an hour or two.
Well then
We cant be any help by sitting here
And living his fight through with him, I suppose.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cole had been telephoning in the dark.
Mrs. Coles voice came from an inner room:
Did she call you or you call her?
She me.
Youd better dress: you wont go back to bed.
We must have been asleep: its three and after.
Had she been ringing long? Ill get my wrapper.
I want to speak to her.
All she said was,
He hadnt come and had he really started.
She knew he had, poor thing, two hours ago.
He had the shovel. Hell have made a fight.
Why did I ever let him leave this house!
Dont begin that. You did the best you could
To keep himthough perhaps you didnt quite
Conceal a wish to see him show the spunk
To disobey you. Much his wifell thank you.
Fred, after all I said! You shant make out
That it was any way but what it was.
Did she let on by any word she said
She didnt thank me?
When I told her Gone,
Well then, she said, and Well thenlike a threat.
And then her voice came scraping slow: Oh, you,
Why did you let him go?
Asked why we let him?
You let me there. Ill ask her why she let him.
She didnt dare to speak when he was here.
Their numberstwenty-one? The thing wont work.
Someones receivers down. The handle stumbles.
The stubborn thing, the way it jars your arm!
Its theirs. Shes dropped it from her hand and gone.
Try speaking. Say Hello!
Hello. Hello.
What do you hear?
I hear an empty room
You knowit sounds that way. And yes, I hear
I think I hear a clockand windows rattling.
No step though. If shes there shes sitting down.
Shout, she may hear you.
Shouting is no good.
Keep speaking then.
Hello. Hello. Hello.
You dont suppose? She wouldnt go out doors?
Im half afraid thats just what she might do.
And leave the children?
Wait and call again.
You cant hear whether she has left the door
Wide open and the winds blown out the lamp
And the fires died and the rooms dark and cold?
One of two things, either shes gone to bed
Or gone out doors.
In which case both are lost.
Do you know what shes like? Have you ever met her?
Its strange she doesnt want to speak to us.
Fred, see if you can hear what I hear. Come.
A clock maybe.
Dont you hear something else?
Not talking.
No.
Why, yes, I hearwhat is it?
What do you say it is?
A babys crying!
Frantic it sounds, though muffled and far off.
Its mother wouldnt let it cry like that,
Not if shes there.
What do you make of it?
Theres only one thing possible to make,
That is, assumingthat she has gone out.
Of course she hasnt though. They both sat down
Helpless. Theres nothing we can do till morning.
Fred, I shant let you think of going out.
Hold on. The double bell began to chirp.
They started up. Fred took the telephone.
Hello, Meserve. Youre there, then!And your wife?
Good! Why I askedshe didnt seem to answer.
He says she went to let him in the barn.
Were glad. Oh, say no more about it, man.
Drop in and see us when youre passing.
Well,
She has him then, though what she wants him for
I dont see.
Possibly not for herself.
Maybe she only wants him for the children.
The whole to-do seems to have been for nothing.
What spoiled our night was to him just his fun.
What did he come in for?To talk and visit?
Thought hed just call to tell us it was snowing.
If he thinks he is going to make our house
A halfway coffee house twixt town and nowhere
I thought youd feel youd been too much concerned.
You think you havent been concerned yourself.
If you mean he was inconsiderate
To rout us out to think for him at midnight
And then take our advice no more than nothing,
Why, I agree with you. But lets forgive him.
Weve had a share in one night of his life.
Whatll you bet he ever calls again?