In Flanders

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Through sleet and fogs to the saline bogs
  Where the herring fish meanders,
An army sped, and then, 't is said,
  Swore terribly in Flanders:
  "----!"
  "----!"
A hideous store of oaths they swore,
  Did the army over in Flanders!

At this distant day we're unable to say
  What so aroused their danders;
But it's doubtless the case, to their lasting disgrace,
  That the army swore in Flanders:
  "----!"
  "----!"
And many more such oaths they swore,
  Did that impious horde in Flanders!

Some folks contend that these oaths without end
  Began among the commanders,
That, taking this cue, the subordinates, too,
  Swore terribly in Flanders:
  Twas "------!"
  "----"

Why, the air was blue with the hullaballoo
  Of those wicked men in Flanders!

But some suppose that the trouble arose
  With a certain Corporal Sanders,
Who sought to abuse the wooden shoes
  That the natives wore in Flanders.
  Saying: "----!"
  "----"

What marvel then, that the other men
  Felt encouraged to swear in Flanders!
At any rate, as I grieve to state,
  Since these soldiers vented their danders
Conjectures obtain that for language profane
  There is no such place as Flanders.
  "----"
  "----"

This is the kind of talk you'll find
  If ever you go to Flanders.
How wretched is he, wherever he be,
  That unto this habit panders!
And how glad am I that my interests lie
  In Chicago, and not in Flanders!
  "--------!"
  "--------!"

Would never go down in this circumspect town
However it might in Flanders.

© Eugene Field