Perdition

Why have I never loved? Is it that I am abnormal,
Condemned for my sins, not as some in absurd concavity
Think that the world's a concave? Perhaps I deform all
My senses alight into a form of depravity.
Always the prey of ignoble instincts, always vibrating
At the touch of flesh on my flesh, ah! nervous vibration
That gives me such learned desires of insanely creating
Death into life, an abominable kind of creation
Outside the limits of nature where nature's most sterile,
As on the beds of hired women I wake to remind me
Annihilation awaits me, or some more infamous peril
Shot from a mad girl's eyes, as if some one behind me
Stood in the midnight to stab me, and I was forsaken
Even of myself, lost in caresses, lost in sedition,
Saved in no sense, but hurled half way down to Perdition!