This is the play that Bill wrote --This is the Dane who was off his headWho appears in the play that Bill wrote --This is the book the Professor readAbout the Dane who was off his headWho appears in the play that Bill wrote --This is the gent of German descentWho wrote the book the Professor readAbout the Dane who was off his headWho appears in the play that Bill wrote --These are the notes the Professor embodiedTo use in his lectures, when once he'd studiedIn an English translation the explanation(An awfully cute 'un) the learned TeutonEvolved of the Dane who was not quite saneWho appears in the play that Bill wrote --This is the Prof. that read the bookBut never agreed with the view it took:For he knew much better the "Art," etcetera,Of Bill aforesaid who wrote the playAbout the Dane, who was mad as they say,Than all the German books in a lumpWhich explain that the Dane was off his chumpWho appears in the play that Bill wrote --This is poor Bill who wrote the play;He's dead and gone, so he cannot sayWhat he meant by the Dane of whom it was saidThat he may or may not have been off his head,By the learned Doctor who wrote the screedWith which the Prof. has never agreed,Who both of them think they know much betterThan Billy himself, his "Art," etcetera,And whether he meant the Dane "to be",For "that is the question," or "not to be"As sane as a judge or as mad as a hatter,Or a little of both -- but it don't much matter;For whichever it was we must all of us cramThe notes of the Prof. to pass our exam,Till we're utterly sick of the Dane called Ham-let who comes in the play that Bill Wrote.
Diploma Day Song (1893)
